Thursday, April 24, 2014

In the Company of Women

For men, wine and women are like soda and lime. Both energize their brain and body and make them climb the ladder of their dreams (in dreams only).
There was a time when it was difficult to get at least one woman for even the most dedicated and eligible men and how many bachelors lived and died singing “every night in my dreams…"without finding their ‘Ro-se’!
Jew lived much later in LooB. LooB or Land of oblivion is a place far from the ‘madding crowd’ where wine and women and (sea) water is abundant and has a culture of its own.

Jew was dumped by his school mate fiancée for few reasons known and few unknown to him. He lived with a ‘heart of stone’ nurturing hatred for all the young girls. He was the most serious guy in the land of oblivion when the story started; the one with a 916 Hallmark heart and also a loner. He came there to pursue his post graduation.
After a year of his studies he jumped that wall of the college and reached the foreign orphanage run by French missionaries nearby. He just went to stay there not because of the urge to do service for the physically ill and orphaned people. It must be because of Velmi.

In the orphanage Jew ate, slept like anyone else and shopped vegetables and groceries for the kitchen. He had to climb to do fitting, repairing, cutting down trees in the church compound. There he dug graves for those who died. He cleaned vessels and helped Velmi (@Anna) in cooking.  Velmi was staying there in the ladies section and involved in the activities in kitchen of the orphanage and the nunnery after returning from her college.
The part time jobs took Jew’s major portion of the day. After the sun disappears yet another day for him began.  He had to showcase his skills in the art of consumption and thus became a master. The owners of ECR midum Bar, Kalapet Charaya Shop, James Scott Bar are indebted to his generosity as their profit had gone to a stunning high after he took over their brand ambassador ship.
 Jew emerged from the role of a student to a prospective earning member after one year of his stay in the orphanage. He was proud for having the degree so that he could easily pay all the debts now in the BARS in the ECR where he made his mark. It was because by the time he had established a very strong platform with father Daniel the head of the orphanage and the church.
Jew emerged into the role of an affectionate sibling to our [1]Anna Karenina and all the ‘fathers and brothers’. Anna never wanted the ‘brotherisation’ ceremony a grand function rather she followed a small logic. She called him “my younger brother” with a musical note and the amicable relation was praised in the kingdom of almighty even. The identity was established and  publicized with much praise. Thus Anna got a brother for her and she called him ‘[2]Brother’ Karamasov afterwards.  Karamasov never felt rest when he took up the big responsibility of a brother-picking up, dropping her sister to and from the bus bay, helping her in kitchen, helping her in finishing her BEd. project works!! [After her PG in Jew's college Anna got a BEd. from an outside college].
 And before anyone could find a yardstick to estimate the deepness of affection between them, she had finished her life in the orphanage and migrated to foreign. Karamasov had nothing but few bottles of rum to offer to his stomach and thus bid her farewell.
Alice in the wonderland
Before starting to LooB, Alice had visited few book-shops and found the book “easy ways to commit suicide” by one non famous author and brooded over some usual ways of dying. She spent her mid night oil trying to finalise the latest way to end her life. Due to certain reasons she could not make up her mind for hanging from the ceiling or jumping to the train. In death also there should be dignity. A certain doubt regarding the output had spoiled her plans and the idea was put on hold for a year. LooB seemed like a fuming land in the extreme summer of July (The month Alice joined for her Master of Philosophy). And she didn’t know whether it was from the furious sun or the last hope within her that was burning out.
For Alice, LooB, had been a place to stay until she could invent a novel method of dying. She was fragile due to starving or fasting, living on the idea of a meaningless life, mentally ill and dangerously weak due to continuous illness. Yes she spent her days spinning the notion of a ‘dooms day’ after many years of waiting for her ‘life’. On the contrary, the mysterious territory taught her a way to live life again from the ashes.
The strange desert land seemed unfriendly initially to Alice as it was her first stay outside her home. She could not even find the health to thank god for giving a way to escape finally from her home town.  She was really an Alice in the wonderland. All fresh faces, with lot to discuss, dream and to enjoy and Alice had nothing to contribute to such group of youngsters and was brooding over her past. “She is an unusual character”, both the boys and girls in the campus commented.

Alice met Jew closely during a charity trip together in which he was the in-charge. It was the sixth or seventh month of her stay in LooB.  He seemed as a very dedicated self and she was happy to see an equally serious person there for the first time. Alice waited for a chance to 'become friends with him'.
Pee ( hostel mate of Alice who was pursuing her second MA there) was the easy access to reach Jew and he used to meet her outside the ladies hostel with his close friend Crazy Mohane during the nights. Pee was excited when Alice told her wish. Her roommate Chatty who always opposed Jew never found it a worthy idea. She always used to have logger heads with him. [Chatty was a funny person to listen to. If she opened her mouth, she closed it only when she finished the story of the last person in her village.] Anyway one day Pee and Chatty were able to bring Alice and Jew together for a small chat.
It was after a month or so that Alice got a call for her from Jew asking if she could identify his voice. Later Rajju’s (Alice's classmate) mobile phone kept ringing during the afternoon hours to enquire about the health and well being of Alice when Rajju goes for a nap after her lunch. Night was when Jew utilized his Airtel Student Package offer to call up Pee and spoke till he slept.
Pee had sad stories to tell and she seemed to respect Alice for her age and considered her as bridge and a mediator to connect to Jew. When Pee once narrated the qualities of her ideal man Alice felt an air of relief because Jew never fitted inside those frames.
Jew became the symbol of generosity and kindness to Alice and he appeared as caring as a [4]Good Samaritan. Jew became her caretaker. Slowly she gained confidence in herself and for life.
Jew was known for his rudeness. He never missed any chance to fight. It was said that Jew had waged war with all ‘young girls’ for their ‘approach to life’ then. For him no girl was trustworthy (except Anna, Pee and Alice). “Never discuss what we talk to any stupid girl out there”, he told Alice and was very much particular that she would be closer only to him. (The only girl with whom he spoke softly and politely and with respect).
One night Alice was shocked to see Pee suffering like a snake. She was love sick!!! Calls came less to her cell from Jew after that. Jew started giving more attention to Alice than Anna or Pee. Pee looked for Alice for mercy which was never granted. During her departure from LooB she wept and never said anyone the reason. She stood for hours looking outside the windows  of her room which faces the entrance of the hostel and sang the song of departure. Merie and Laurie (classmates of Alice and also a friend of Pee) sang chorus to her. Alice felt relieved and she was busy composing another ‘[5]songs of innocence and experience’ for her forthcoming days in the desert.
 After a heavy summer, rain came and Alice enjoyed the midday warmth of sun and evening cool breeze. There was no one to sing and dance in the back ground as it was summer vacation for everyone. The whole 800 acres of campus became a cape of good hope which was once a place where [6]angels feared to tread. Alice never felt sun, rain and chillness as she was under the protective shield.

The relation between Alice and Jew severed suddenly after six months or so and slowly Alice too became his past.She was on a visit to his house with a feeling that she found a home for herself after years of exile . Alice never knew that it will also be a [7]Golgotha for her (Jew's house was located on a small hill). It was when she disclosed to him that her future lies in his hands that Jew smelt a great danger. He swore that he would never be anywhere near the ladies hostel and that she too was one among the three ‘sisters’ [along with Anna and Pee]only with whom he was moving close.

Father Daniel Jones was a savior to many. Our hero confided in him life’s most sorrowful events and about the troubles he had including Alice after his decision to stay away from her.
Alice worked day and night for bringing back those wonderful days but she was strongly advised and was kept at a distance. Jew felt her presence as most repelling.

Every now and then people from various countries used to come for doing voluntary service to the orphans and the patients and French girl Pauline came and stayed there for few months. So soon she found her [8]Count of Monte Christo in the orphanage.  Jew started building his dreams around his [9]Mercedes and our Alice was informed strictly not to disturb him as he was busy scheduling his marriage with Pauline and his shift to France. What would have happened? we don't know. Later Pauline finished her work in LooB and left for France thanking the good company of Jew and assured him to send a T-shirt on every birthday and thus made him happy.
Pauline left.  Alice was forgotten. Sree came after [The new entry was heard pursuing her graduation somewhere far and was from another corner of Jew's state].

Alice occasionally sent messages to Jew but got no reply. It was after two and half years of parting their ways that Alice received  a message from him. “I am enjoying my life on the ‘shores of love with my lover and I don’t even think about you. I will live with the girl whom I love, she is waiting for me. I never liked you at all”.   (after that Alice got no messages) She could not be able to think if it was the beginning of a True love story or the end of an old one? Jew must have moved into the next phase of his uncertainty. Don’t know what happened to father Daniel Jones. Jew could not follow him to Canada but only wished him ‘Bon Voyage'.

After four years, once Alice went to LooB to stay for few days. Jew had been into some jobs along with the job inside the orphanage and had lost his hallmark heart years before itself. For Alice Jew was still a golden memory who brought her back to life and could never be hated or forgotten. She intended to become normal friends with him and also planned to have a quarter  and to party. But to her dismay he refused even to face her telling that he would be busy. The last drop of reverence was gone when she saw him in the company of a new batch of female students outside the college building during the night. Jew noticed Alice watching him from a distance. Suddenly he came out from the group he walked past her keeping his head bend like a shameful thief accompanied by police.  
Alice was sitting on a stone bench contemplating. It was during the night before her departure after staying in LooB for three days. She wondered if she was witnessing the [10]Metamorphosis of Kafka and  then decided to read the novel [11]Frankenstein and overcome that sorrow or to take a half or quarter of bagpiper and chicken. Alice could not sleep that night. She recollected the day when she swallowed a bottle of kingfisher beer [and became giddy] for two reasons- to beat the sorrow of a tragedy of losing Jew’s guardianship and then to show equality with men.

In LooB Jew had mastered many things not because he already had his masters in PHYSICAL education. It took time for Alice to understand that for him each woman turned merely the magical medicine to enjoy the present and to forget his past. He enjoyed the Company of Women and never understood them or took them for his future.





[1]  Russian Novelist Leo Tolstoy’s novel (1877)
[2] The final novel by Russian Author Fyodor Dostoyevsky (1880)
[3] Tamil comedy actor, script writer and play Wright

[4] The parable of the Good Samaritan is a parable told by Jesus  in only one of the gospels of the New Testament. According to the Gospel of Luke (10:29–37) a traveller) is beaten, robbed, and left half dead along the road. First a priest and then a Levite come by, but both avoid the man. Finally, a Samaritan comes by. Samaritans and Jews generally despised each other, but the Samaritan helps the injured man. Jesus is described as telling the parable in response to a question regarding the identity of the "neighbour", who should be loved.

[5] Songs of Innocence and of Experience is an illustrated collection of poems by William Blake (1789)
[6] Where Angels Fear to Tread (1905) is a novel by E. M. Forster, originally entitled Monteriano. The title comes from a line in Alexander Pope's An Essay on Criticism: "For fools rush in where angels fear to tread".
[7] Golgotha or calvary was, according to the Gospels, a site immediately outside Jerusalem's walls where Jesus was crucified
[8] The Count of Monte Cristo  is an adventure novel by French author Alexandre Dumas completed in 1844. It is one of the author's most popular works, along with The Three Musketeers.  The story takes place in France, Italy and islands in the Mediterranean during the historical events of 1815–1838. 
[9]  Mercedes is the fiancée of the hero of The count of Monte cristo,  Edmond Dantès

[10] A major change in the appearance or character of someone or something(meaning)/ The Metamorphosis  is a novella byFranz Kafka, first published in 1915. The story begins with a traveling salesman, Gregor Samsa, waking to find himself transformed (metamorphosed) into a large, monstrous insect-like creature.

[11] Frankenstein, or The Modern Prometheus, is a novel written by British author Mary Shelley about eccentric scientist Victor Frankenstein, who creates a grotesque creature in an unorthodox scientific experiment. Since publication of the novel, the name "Frankenstein" is often used to refer to the monster itself.

Tuesday, March 26, 2013

www.'kerala mad-try-money'.com


Getting strange manias and revelations when the mood is down is not unusual for some persons. And they proudly think it as a part of being highly ‘creative’. These people go crazy and attempt certain things unmindful of the results. They think that as a part of one more experience. Who claimed it as the propriety of only a [1]psychopath? 
One such interesting person is our heroine Maggie who thinks herself as highly judgmental and often gets the mentality to take revenge on someone and even to herself, when she is upset. I am not an authority to tell if she is psychologically fit or not. You understand yourself and then decide. 

Beginning
The curtain for the whole gamut of events was raised when Maggie casually registered in a matrimonial site one day thinking it as a harmless gambling. She has been remaining successfully single in her personal life till then. Age never decided the eligibility for being ‘young’ for Maggie and she still feels herself as an eternal young woman. Even now people half of her age takes her as equal to their age. She too feels as if she was born a few years ago, even after completing more than ten years in job.

The idea of bringing life partners for those who want to ‘settle’ ‘down’ (not settle ‘up’) through‘on line registration’ came thrusting to her mind few years before. She decided to register with a second thought. Daily she spent one hour to see the various poses and the explanations and collected the irrelevant data until her eyes turned dim and head turned giddy. That was sent to the national and state laboratories for a detailed diagnosis. When it became a daily routine she managed to take it as a good time pass getting to know about the attitude of those men wanting to get one woman to live with.  She worked overtime with no salary.

The profile was filled with much care and with utmost dedication. She described herself as someone in so and so profession who likes to meet another who is not seeking just a woman but a so and so….

Luckily Maggie left the space for the photo empty thinking how the response will be with the given items. 
Thus she made job of the ‘bride seeker’ tough.
 Before the selection the seeker had to first see the female face. Some would insist for a full size photo. They will see the position of eyes, ear and teeth and then had to take correct measurement before coming to the rest of the portions for a final judgment. After all this is a procedure that is deciding one’s destiny.

Requests started pouring in from all corners including heaven and hell for uploading a photo at the earliest. Most of them were anonymous requests, from those faceless men who wanted to see the female face before showing their own. The screening process started with so much vigor. 

A gentleman before retiring felt it fine to have a companion for life and asked Maggie to give a reference! Maggie gave the expected one, tips to find a partner from the desolate women who may find it difficult to live without a man or those spinsters who were on the verge of starting their retired life.

 A brave heart who lost his wife recently wanted a partner. He was particular that the ‘bride to be’ had to wait for a year. This sorrowful man had to peacefully mourn for his wife who expired recently, before taking another course.
 And after one year she should relocate to the prospective groom’s work place also. Her job will not be a priority at all. She should never forget her responsibility of taking care of at least one of his children too.
You never should have any likes or dislikes of your own once you are somebody's 'property'. After that everything becomes a history with no past and present but only future.
You can be highly critical of people only until you find one holy cow or buffalo.
Ok. Where did we stop?
Yes.
 There are few others who decided to check the [2]IQ, EQ of the female first. They might take another few years to decide. And on one fine morning will ask ‘if you are still there, eligible’. They may try to convince  you when they come back saying that their mothers were undergoing ‘treatment’. Now getting back to you, for a second innings. A RETRY.
 There is yet another peculiar variety. They need someone to draw them the route of journey. They will happily begin. They can be molded into any shape and size as you desire. They are shapeless!

One poor fellow lamented and was behind Maggie for quite a long time. He tried his level best to convince  his intelligence. This fellow is in a temporary job and had to find another afterwards. Maggie decided that he was route-less. Finally he had to literally lament saying that he was rejected because he was 100% truthful.
Look how he showed his respect for women!
He forwarded messages saying "women are mothers, daughters, sisters and goddesses". He showed his humbleness by calling her more intelligent and a 'professor' very often. He sent the article he wrote and the project he had submitted. And  also recommended you to showcase your knowledge by helping his friends in their write ups.
Is the project work that he mailed to you is not an evidence of his intelligence? 
He will send you the address and full profile of the teachers who taught him right from his school days some 20 years ago.
Finally you were not accepting his friend request in the Face Book also!! 

Middle
An ISD call came to spoil Maggie’s sweet dreams one night.  The moment Maggie picked it she heard enquiries. “Who are you? What is your name?” The caller did not state the purpose of the call .
He was asked to say why he called. The reply came. 
“I called to marry you”. Oh!   His name was Macho.

He got irritated when he was told to be descent while talking to people who are strangers, that too over the phone. He was very clear that Maggie was abnormal and he laughed at her request.

He clearly stated, before he makes calls, he could hardly find time even to check the profile of the ladies. His job is under the sea. And as soon as he comes ‘up’ he collects the profiles and calls ladies straight away without even knowing whether he is calling Lilly, Maggie or Geetha. When Maggie was silent for a second after he mentioned his profession, he explained the Oxford and Webster’s dictionary meaning of the term ‘diving’. 
 He proudly explained his [3](Macho) manias so openly- Drinking alcohol, smoking etc. etc. He also admitted that he was coal dark. He was curious to know whether Maggie is looking good, beautiful, her height and weight. She said “I am considered as of having a normal complexion and my height is 5feet 3 and weight 55”. She explained that “dark color does not matter and it is natural for men to occasionally drink!”

 Macho was very disappointed when he did not get a clear picture of how Maggie looked. “How could a person become ignorant of the way she looks i.e. looking good or not?” he asked curiously.

She overheard the pumping of blood to her veins and arteries and tried maximum to control it coming out. 
Macho made calls one after another and gave a biographical sketch of him and thus proved to be more efficient than a [4]Lytton Strachey. He has several brothers and sisters and he detailed the remaining portion of the life history. 
 Macho made clear how he is worried about 'her' future. Even if she turns down his ‘offer’ he warned her to get married to ‘someone’ and settle down for her wellness.  Maggie tried to educate him by telling that getting old is a natural phenomenon which no one can stop and no use worrying about. 
Her foolish talk irritated him and asked her not to be rude, which can only irritate a man, make him laugh and feel pity for her.He advised Maggie not to be rude to people who are genuine MCPs and instructed her to be polite. 

After the first day’s call (as the next day was a Friday which would be an off day for him) Maggie got nearly 100 missed calls from Macho the next day. He even sent her messages requesting to attend the call “Maggie, it is from me Macho, please pick up my calls”. This attempt continued for a week or so until she threatened to inform the cyber cell for harassment.
The End

The conversation came to an end. She was now clear ‘what to be’ and ‘how to be’ rather than “to be or not be” before she could go completely insane. She can never be a [5]Desdemona or an [6]Ophelia for that matter. This revelation came after the stranger’s repeated warning to get settled in life before too late.

I know Macho would not have gone for[7]saraku for his full life after the disappointment as he was a [8]Johnny walker already. The past time of one minute, of uploading a profile, taught Maggie such a big lesson in life and she pitied herself. Finally she decided to put up a warning notice on the threshold of her ‘smartness’ and came to a conclusion that this rat race is not her cup of tea.

Maggie understood that her experiment with the mistake she did to herself was a lesson and drew the final border line using a red-black marker pen.



[1] A person having serious mental illness that causes them to behave violently
[2] Intelligent and emotional quotient

[3] Having or characterized by qualities considered manly, especially when manifested in an assertive, self-conscious, or dominating way and having a strong or exaggerated sense of power or the right to dominate.

[4]  He is best known for establishing a new form of biography in which psychological insight and sympathy are combined with irreverence and wit. His 1921 biography Queen Victoria was awarded the James Tait Black Memorial Prize.
[5] The heroine of Shakespeare’s Othello, known for her humble and submissive nature
[6] Heroine of Shakespeare’s Hamlet, who became insane after seeing the tragic life of Hamlet and commits suicide
[7] Regional name for liquor
[8] A foreign liquor brand

Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Different Ways to Spoil a Day


My dearest Virgi…

Have you ever tried to delve deep to find reasons behind seeing a perfect day of yours turning completely damned? Here is one example which can be of quick reference for those who want some tips to spoil a calm and composed day of others or of theirs.

I can’t claim to be a [1]Dale Carnegie for giving this small piece of information anyway.

                                                                Episode 1

The day was cheerful with a mindful of plans for the future as it was my first visit to my hometown  before shifting to a rented apartment. I was informed suddenly that Uno found a ‘guy’ for his 'affectionate sister'!! Mamma was overjoyed and there was an air of excitement around her after she got his phone call from the national capital.

I was awestruck! Words blocked halfway through as there was lot of traffic jam around. Then a sudden outburst of protest. Next came the breaking news… The ‘boy’s’ family was going to drop in as it was the procedure to examine the prospective ‘girl’ as the first step in the selection process.

The breaking news which was released by the Delhi bureau created lot of furor here in the extreme south and the police used tear gas to disperse the protesters?!!

                                                                  Episode 2

Finally they came in with an array of questions to be answered and to see through. 

The ladies took measurement and started to calculate. I fixed a cheerful smile to cover my uneasiness. My regularities and irregularities were explained and finally lost the thought to look around to see the real ‘guy’. The only job which I had to do. 

The two active 'girls'  gave self introduction- one the guy's ‘mother’ and the other his younger brother’s wife- and helped me to find the ‘guy’ finally. I was formally introduced to the guy. It would be better to say that I was walking on the ramp with audience around with a new style to exhibit.

He seemed shy even to give me a direct look.  I could see only  a bit of his head. No... no... it was not with both hands but was trying to cover with one and the face was half seen.  It reminded me of the heroines of 19th century [2]Victorian novels. I showed my teeth in response. He was searching for words and could not find any and was 'stomach full' and  on the verge to get indigestion soon due to ‘over eating’.

I demanded time to go through his profile seriously before getting back to them. My solo performance was applauded I guess. While retreating to their vehicle ‘which the guy drove and came’ (the boy’s mother was very specific to mention this), I saw a much excited smiling face turning back and playing hide and seek. Oh! So I was supposed to involve in this game too, I felt sorry actually as I was not capable of these performances.

                                                                     Episode 3

Don’t think everything was over and I regained my spirits soon. I was down with [3]MOF, amnesia or dyslexia or [4]delirium? I was not sure.  I was seriously intrigued and subjected to get an immediate reaction, where the  result was expected to be strictly positive. 

Mamma claimed the coyness and lack of perspective of the guy could be used to the girl’s favor. 

When the result was announced negative even after so many tests and retests, the whole calmness turned topsy turvy.

I was bitten severely by severe strokes from inside and outside. A feed back was required to send to the Delhi headquarters immediately. As Mamma was informed that this would turn to be a perfect match for her daughter, she was using and misusing her power over me to accept. A memo was faxed to me from the head quarters warning not to spoil a ‘very serious’ sibling blood relation by my lack of insight and my childishness.

                                                              Retrospection

Virgi... What is special in 'just being a man’? I wondered. Being just a man facilitates him to have another world war or to steal someone’s property claiming that he is a man and a dictator or a thief? I have never read or heard any woman directly involved or became reason for any world war or a robbery or any heinous crime.

Who gave men the authority to decide a woman’s life? Like what you did when you surrendered to a man just to save your family's financial burden. And that ‘guardian angel’ could never be able to  turn to be your soul mate but only the father of your child! What could be that which make you a contented person, I know. But still i ask, leaving all your self-centric eccentricities, why couldn't you just satisfy your 'man' who wants only a woman for his life?

Once a friend of mine proudly said that he fed and sheltered a woman i.e., his wife so that she could give him comforts and begets his children and also do all household works. All the reverence for him had melted away from that moment and was replaced with ‘contempt of court’. This poor friend is now busy after fathering two kids, feeding the entire family. I did not feel sorry to ‘quit’ the relationship with him. He can only be a 'man' not a companion or friend was made clear. I might be arrogant or immature in my decision(as per the general perception) to give up that relation.

Ok. Leave all those stories and come to the real matter. So again I was put to severe pressure to find only good qualities in men. I was advised to accept this particular guy who is our topic of gossip who gave me ‘eloquent glances’ while crossing the doorstep and went with expectation to settle down leaving his fifteen years of job abroad, with the girl he marries. I was suggested this one, as the best I could expect as he was looking ‘fair’, younger to his age and with no conditions even about his own life itself and moreover I crossed the age boundary for that  sacred work.

Weeks passed and month too with some continuous ‘oxidative-coupling reactions’ which increased the pressure inside and resulted in a severe blast in the ‘furnace’. Half of my energy was wasted and I started developing a perpetual emptiness.

                                                                     Climax

The whole scenario came to a standstill with a massive withdrawal of output from Uno and his family. The press release from the Delhi headquarters claimed  failure of the process was due to my lack of foresight and silly attitude . This current state of my life being ‘unmarried’ was explained clearly by Mrs. Uno as 'useless and a sign of arrogance' and also against the 'social rule of law'.

Mamma was deeply disheartened by my lack of humane interest for her and for the whole lot of well wishers outside. I could not be successful without having a man. My life would be doomed! 

Heard a hell lot of explanations.

                                                                  No Interval

When every profile reaches regional center I would be standing on one leg claiming their lives! Likewise this carnival continued for few more months bringing turmoil which extended till another was received.  I was expected to see all and then? I don't know. It was not made clear, when it was handed over. Am I supposed to tell to make inquiry as I liked this one, and later would i be to waiting for that ‘guy’ until he responds (if)positively? 

Ok or I should make calls and confirm that he had the power of articulation and what else I should do? I might get few mails calling me ‘dear’, ‘my dear’ and describing with a lot of adjectives ‘beautiful’, ‘smart’ etc etc. and explaining their talents and interest. Recently one expressed his closeness calling me as his ‘dear’, ‘beloved’ and was seriously waiting to take me to England if I say a mere “yes”. Seeing his over excitement I lost all interest even to think about England. These things only distract my mindset and extracting my peace.

Years have gone by and will be going and still I need to be ready to be chosen and be always remain like the ‘display’ material in the shops with variety costumes so that anyone can come and verify and ‘purchase’ or reject?


SO finally I said a blind ‘no’ to seeing anymore ‘eligible men’ with their description about their eagerness to verify me. 

                                                              The End

My future was in cloud nine because I had stopped living for the future. Great work to be thanked for.

Is it worth living for a future which is yet to be revealed to us? How to find the solemnity that lies hidden? The meaning of ‘life’ is found nowhere in the dictionary. No literature could be able to define it unless someone quote it down after sailing through it.  Even I am not aware if I have the power for further protest and actions and reactions to carry forward.

                                                                
Like you I may explore and see the meaning of what ‘life’ actually is by attending Bhajans, reading Bhagavat Gita and other texts or becoming an active participant of the Hare Rama Hare Krishna, in the next part of my life. Till then I need to rejuvenate myself by dipping in the sacred ‘fool’s paradise’ to realize the necessity for being a part of it. Waiting for your reaction. 

My regards and love

Yours Explo.

      Appendix

[5]Coward thy name is man! This is not to insult thy ego but to make your conscience feel uneasy if you have one. What are you afraid of? The woman with a mind, the one who repeatedly asked you questions? You don’t have the courage to withstand her presence and said she might feel bad if you remained silent? You never had the courage to accept the troubles around if you accept her and so said she was misleading you with her emotions? You wanted her to fill the gaps in your existence and said you never meant to hurt her through the closeness you showed, when she started feeling emotionally attached. Finally you saved your face by claiming her as your elder sister (because you are few years younger)?

You were made to believe that you need to be the head of the family and everyone should accept you only because you are a man? The mother, wife and all grandparents and your children accepted your superiority and all others were [6]‘mad woman in the attic’ only because they had their voices and also raised it for some or the other reasons?

Know the soul of a woman and then judge her. Before that don’t lose her, blaming that she has a ‘voice’ which is heard and not suppressed.

So I lost all prospective guys and eligible men and now much relaxed.

If anyone of my friends  can suggest various ways of losing a ‘man’, we can publish an un abridged version for the betterment of all the helpless souls who are crying for identity (either through a man or without a man) instead of wasting their time watching a movie ‘[7]how to lose a guy in ten days”?.




[1] An American writer and lecturer (1888-1955) and developer of famous courses for self improvement, public speaking and interpersonal skills. Authored many books including “How to make friends and influence people?”, “How to stop worrying and start thinking?”
[2] Pious, dutiful, obedient with no freedom of thought and movement
[3] multiple organ failure
[4] Latin word for madness
[5] As opposed to Shakespeare’s “frailty thy name is woman” from his famous Hamlet
[6] A character of the novel Jane Eyre whose is known with that name because of her unnatural behaviour
[7] A romantic comedy movie by  Donald Petrie